You can make toast with an iron, but you can't iron with a toaster.

 

Need to compose a nasty letter to your mate without consuming too much negative energy. Use Mark's free generator.

Links to both mens and womens versions are right under this text...

 

  

  Be

  a

  Bitch

 

 

  Be

  a

  Bastard 

 

   

Just remember, you didn't get this from me or OneWalrus.

I'm hoping someone sends me a sordid message... my e-addy is all over here.

 

Here's one I wrote to myself:

 

From: rojombre@gmail.com
To: all female readers
Subject: "I truly apologize..."

Dear Mrs. Lucky,

I'm not sorry at all for neglecting to put the toilet seat down. I was on my knees worshipping your shrine and thought I'd ask Dave to help me with it tomorrow.

So I'm thinking about how crazy your family is hoping you don't make me wear The Outfit. Please, just forget about it.
Forget about the money you owe me and we'll call it even.


Love,
That guy