You can make toast with an iron, but you can't iron with a toaster.

Just arose from a splendid afternoon nap and made the questionable choice to come here and write a bit. I have pared by blogging down to almost none, but it is a good exercise now and then to practice writing, rhetoric and time-wasting skills. Enough prefacing already, I need to jump right in with my latest jag.

 

Visiting here a couple days ago I was reading the "top-blog" from dannimarie76. Occasionally a person is able to achieve the difficult task of completely revealing every aspect of their character in three paragraphs. This blog titled Pondering achieved transparency expertly. Or, to rephrase: What a freekin'  blathering, bitch and moan session.

 

I have a strong suspicion that the three paragraphs were generated by some cryptography-software. Maybe something akin to "Dumb-ass Disguise" or "Idiot Inoculation". I refuse to believe otherwise. It would hurt to do so because I would be admitting being a member of the same species, a fellow sentient being, who created this piece of scat.

 

(Please understand I really don't care one iota about any of this.)

 

In an effort to test my suspicions I sent a couple comments to this, uh, typist. My comment read as follows:

My take is this free, miniscule digital arena is no different than any other aspect of life. You learn to find your own personal, comfortable niche and avoid the things which make you uncomfortable

Honestly, I think you're whining too! That it took you a month to determine the demographics of Mindsay may speak to your comments more than any other factor.

It's all just vapor sir. Really it's less tangible and meaningful than the most ephemeral thing you can imagine.

Poof!

Pablo

In response I recieved:

Sir?

 

To which I responded:

Pardon me, I didn't realize this was a gender issue which by disengendering you flumoxed you into a lack of ability to respond beyond the monosyllabic. Interesting and insightful.

Pablo

 

And finally, the cou de grace of all retorts fell upon me:

Thank you so much for your comments.  Have a great day. (The ultimate Walmartian verbage.)

 

Wow. I was disappointed I wasn't also gifted with a smiley-face emoticon. But at least I proved to myself I am still safe. There cannot possibly be a human on the other end of these words unless I allow one last benefit of doubt - de-evolution.

 

There, now this crusty SOB can be nice to everyone in his real life for the rest of the week having exhausted all vituperation upon the innocent and unsuspecting strangers of the ethereal-digital-vacuum.

 

Pablo

 

P.S. I do not apologize to anyone from the middle-America, Bible-belt, Walmart, Billy Graham, velvet-painting, kool-aid, marshmallow-salad, homophobic, Bush-loving, needlepoint, Pat Robertson, Bill O'Rielly, Christian Right, or any other namby-pamby-knee-jerk-cableTV-idiot crowd.